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It's alive

report after one year of abstinence, I am at LJ's go back again. Since most people have
that drew me here, too geaddet Mexx, know pretty much all aware that I was alive and more or less was active.

Did my FOS finally finished and soon after my new job lined up.
now working at the VSU (United Security Companies) in the plant protection as a receptionist Oo '
bin for two objects previously classified. For one thing, the Lurgi (similar to the IG Metal) and Hyundai (for all that are not on it: Korean car brand: D)
My main object is the Lurgi (among other things because it is 7 minutes by train from where I live löl * *)
My working hours Lurgi will be 6:30 to 17:00 (in the short film!) and up in the Long 19:30.
with yet another reason why so long did nothing to me. Because that is you have to get used to it at first, until one evening not so groggie that one is dead in bed.
in the Hyundai, the layers are shorter: 8:00 to 17:00 clock
But since I'm paid by the hour, I prefer the Lurgi ^ ^ '

Soooo, that was it first with NEM short interim report from me. Since I, 24 also allowed to work, because then I'll write again what.
Until then ... Keep your ears stiff

people

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Tribune @ 2009-10-29T20: 41:00

maybe I write not the only reason for time messages anymore because I put my thoughts will not.


I've just snapped out of context a sentence. "It's like infinite and infinitely small"

about I just thought about it. infinite. that's hard to imagine, and therefore fascinating.
infinitely small. wants to open up to me even less.

I wonder if all thought so at first. that something snaps. it is interpreted and analyzed. and finally comes out somewhere else, like there is written my introductory paragraph.
that resulted only because I asked if I thought a think about the entry or should.
I had almost collected enough motivation, but then when I read fall into my desk chair and was overwhelmed by a crippling pain.
and yet I'm here now.
strange.
but now I go again.

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I enter the bakery. There are only two customers in front of me, and they seem to belong together. I quickly feel into me, that is me today, the meaning. The chocolate croissants instantly awaken my interest. But that's not enough. Perhaps a poppy to this? None in sight. Better to normal. At that moment the baker's assistant comes in with a tray of fresh bread as he wanted to support my decision.
Operation is still busy, so I wait, and meanwhile take the croissants inspected.
Although the word is in Kross croissant, I do not think this should make it a model.
She loves to have me, if the crust has been little brown, and they are still quite soft and tender. Most also look just as I would like them, except one. Its crust is clear brown. It is precisely to Top furthest away from me. Meanwhile, the customers are still einfrig involved in a conversation with the waitress. I estimate the chances that I catch one of the croissants. Then a second operation. It speaks to me, what I would have liked. I tell her. I will not mention it my prejudice against this one croissant. Internally, however, I implore them, even to reach for another.
She grabs a sandwich in a bag. In a second she then places a croissant. It was too fast, I was wrong and could not see what it was.
I move to the side, let my eyes wander over the baked goods, looking for the enemy. But he is gone.
I pay, thank you, and leave the bakery.

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7 8

The kitchen is shrouded in the pale light of the weak light sources. We play board games. And I enjoy very much of this society. However, I've pulled me back a little to small magnetic plaques move to cope with inscriptions. Again and again I take the box labeled "fridge poetry" in it to keep on the lookout for missing words.
I am just looking for a "feel", or "touch" one. But I find nothing.
It is an exciting experience to want to express themselves, but only a very limited space to have expression. If I find a new word-scraps inspire me and who I try to shape my thoughts.
loses Sometime later, the restriction on the kitchen table. We begin together to assign each word to its rightful place. The hot plate is marked with "hot" the ceiling gets a "top" and also provided door and even the outlet do not go out empty.
It is getting late and I have to force myself to break up.
Secretly I grab another word before I go into the room by Jana to get my things in order. The plate bearing the words "thanks" is carefully hidden under their keyboards. We hug goodbye, I go down the stairs and dark in the night and look forward to.
I can not wait now that my message, they finally reached.

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Tribune @ 2009-10-18T22: 30:00

lately I like to write messages, and set them for no one else visible in my LiveJournal.
there I let them ripen. or wait until she no longer very hurt. until I let her go. that anyone can read it, because if he wants.
while in hand behind the new words already waiting to be finally pronounced.

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6

I open a peanut consider it briefly, smell it, and I finally put them in the mouth.
instead of a peanut taste I suddenly remember: It is winter. Snow on the roads. The night has already fallen. And even the artificial light of the lantern is swallowed by it. I'm on a holiday complex in Holland. A pervasive silence buzzing in my ears. I'm about 14 years old. In the air, the smell of chlorine is from the nearby swimming pool experience. I have just new knee pads found under the Christmas tree and I'm out there to inaugurate it together with in-line skates. The paving stones, however, have large grooves and roll over it with my whole body vibrates.
Everything seems so unreal, and it is of course.
I indulge for a moment in this new old perception.
think I'm getting back to my workplace. It is bright and peaceful.
Then I open the next nut to bite eagerly, and taste just peanut.

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it is so quiet now

I think it was in 2006 when my activities subsided on LiveJournal almählich. Then came all right now and then even a slight echo, but essentially I had long silent.

versa so slowly my voice back. I look around, browse to "old friend" who still go to my high time (strange: pendant that the "deep-time" is the "wedding") for the elite were and they had eventually lost kicked, or whatever always.

and I notice: they are all gone. at least mostly. "I read nothing more", "this journal is already dead." all gone.

it seems probably something like an average length of life give a live journal. and if you look at the same time meet, we will also address at about the same again.

someone who is still left over, has recently asked for tips on interesting users (and communities). I like the idea, and attack them on you.
if anyone reading this, and you who have recommended, please let me know. ;)

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@ tribune 2009-10-08T16: 02:00

dark shadow covers the day in silence.

it is as if unspoken thoughts at this hour a little louder.

the imaginative moves a little closer to the reality and the difference is hardly noticeable increase.

music suddenly seems like a quiet promise.

it is about time to add the tiredness.

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5

We use our lunch break to go shopping.
On the way I talk of Heike a quote from the book that I've just read only.
It goes something like: "If you're only reasonable, you will experience nothing more."
Somehow I like the saying. It justifies everything so beautiful.
We go to the Tchibo shop. There, hanging function gloves. Heike says she has even bought functional underwear. Did not work.
I'm thinking about this made-up word. It reminds me of the term "Flower Net", which I thought not long ago.
I write it down. Heike interrupts me and shows me a Jazzpant want to buy it.
Has it a function? - I ask.
- No. But what really great! One back pocket for a key.
- Have you used to lock?
- Yeah! - She says.

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not sent messages are still the most honest

I carry in the last few times around with me. I write in my head one by one. read it after me in places again. underline a few words and add others.
to form something new, which is silent but ultimately never overcome that.

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I have her searched nearby, and something else found

love movies are cruel. they stop in front of you what do you do it wrong.
I feel like I'm neglecting stefanie be too distant in recent times to give her a little tenderness.

So I went to the bedroom. where they lay in bed and read. I sat down on the bed, initially played around the clock, and the delayed moment when I turned to her.
but when I finally did, her eyes were focused on the iron book.
only after some time, she noticed my glance.
not done what I had expected. While we talk, but remain aloof. she noticed my not at all desire.
I get my toothbrush electric, sit down next to stefanie and tell her that she now has two minutes to give me something to tell.
then I put my brush in the mouth and press the button on.
the running time.
them about their day. before the first 30 seconds of signal they turn itself off and turns her book to. I remain seated.
look expectantly.
30 seconds later, she says, for a brief moment once again somewhat insignificant before they again distanced.
she reads. I wait.
the toothbrush completed its fourth interval.
I go to my mouth auszuspühlen, and not return.

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4

My book is currently being read. I'm lying in the bathtub and turn on the plug. Then I reach for my shower gel.
Its inscription caught my attention. I read: Axe - Limited Edition "Summer".
The veracity of this line like that. While I was deep in thought on the package rigid, and the water constantly flows out of the tub, I noticed how my Body becomes increasingly difficult as more projects out of him now from the water surface.
am After a while I finally and foaming up with me. I capture them before the shower gel to use as long as it goes. For despite the winter.
And I wonder if I'll like, wrapped in a bathrobe bring this knowledge to paper.
pee when I washed off naturally into the tub, which has now become a shower.
I consider this detail to write down also. The obscenity like me. It makes me naked, just as I am already anyway.

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3

I let fall the book and look at the cat, as they lost in the hollow of my thick blanket is between my legs.
you dressing up.
I want to keep this cozy moment and ask Stefan to pen and paper.
When she throws me the Kulli, startled the cat, and the atmosphere will be gone.

But now, when writing the present has caught up, all is calm again. More than that. Stefanie has ended their computer game and laid next to me.
you are reading. The cat purrs. I can feel the vibration in my calf.
I look up. Siri's eyes are closed to slits.
Now I'll gently insert pen and pad in hand, and in turn sink into my book.

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refrigerator poetry

A few pictures from last weekend's poetry:


















(This beautiful set is not by me but by Jana;)

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Tribune @ 2009-10-04T17: 23 : 00

This experience suggests wider circles than we thought.



Heike (a good friend), 17:18 clock:

The thing with the apple sauce

I have a friend.
The fact alone is not so bad. If it were not the case with The apple sauce would be.
goulash, dumplings and red cabbage - a typical German dish. No. These include apple sauce.

I do not know myself how could this happen to me, but at our last meal together, I had just forgotten it.
No problem, we'll just buy at the gas station. No sooner said than done, he drove off.

After about 30 minutes I ungeduldigt and nervous.
This is all wrong. So I pick up the phone - it sounds but no one raises hab.
I'm worried. Accident. Ditch or worse. Since my phone is ringing
. The well-known voice said to me that there were several gas stations and kiosks, not applesauce. But I did
that he would never give up looking for it.

So I reach for the phone again, calling all my friends and acquaintances to close to me all the same advice but give yourself to cook some.
appeared to me as though insuperable challange. Applesauce - I had no idea how to do that.

doorbell rings, I see in my monitor video surveillance: applesauce.

Michael opens a bottle of red wine in the kitchen - he had no idea.


---

Erwin (my father), 17:19 clock:

So, I'm off a little in Mexico. If I were not there yourself, you should I envy me. ;-))

I had now gone too, because Helen is upset because they now have to eat our stew without applesauce!

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The thing with the apple sauce 2

It's like this:
If there is goulash with dumplings, I like to nunmal like applesauce.
So I'm used to. And so that is.
were after the visit to my sister, we agreed to just have this meal. However, failure applesauce was apprehended.
So was the plan to drive to the gas station shortly. If yes holiday, and there is nothing more to. Said and done. Into the car and the nearest gas station.
me there yawned an empty shelf number, the label was marked with applesauce. Well, at least there was now Hope that such a thing even exists at gas stations. So on to the next. But unfortunately nothing. A third station was
it still within reach. Again, I had to again leave the store empty-handed.
On the way back we stopped at two kiosk shops that I would like to sell cigarettes, but there were none in apple flavor.
Where we are on flavor. When getting out, I had yet Stefanie made aware of the dog pile. When you enter again not. Therefore accompanied us the whole trip on a scent that I would not describe in detail. With apples but he had little in common.
As we drove past the house of my sister, I had the Idea might be to find something there. The number was dialed quickly, but the message "This number is not assigned" sounded not at all for her.
Okay, I'll call my mother to stop, with little hope she was still there to visit. But again, I heard the same voice promt.
times I probably should update my numbers.
Last try: I called my father. And in fact he went straight to the phone. Without me long stay with welcoming phrases like I said that I was looking for apple sauce. Undeterred, he told me left that he look again. "We applesauce. I set it on the kitchen table have." was after all the positive message.
But first I wanted to try it with my sister. I asked for their current phone number, and tried my luck. Not applicable. So there was nothing but the way over to my parents house. How liberating it was to keep the glass finally applesauce in his hands.
Now I know also about how it must have been before, when you look at the food still had to hunt.

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I visit my sister. It celebrates the debut of their new home.
The air in the living room is so thick that you could slice it. Smokers.
I escape to the kitchen, under the pretext of me to look at the apartment.
But I'm late, this hiding place is already claimed.
On the kitchen cupboard I discovered one of the two cats.
It fits just between the gap between cabinet and ceiling.
The antique piece of furniture opposite caught my attention. While I look at it I notice suddenly familiar contours. I recognize him again. From before.
But then, he had been much larger.
The new perspective on the old cabinet fascinated me for a moment.
The next I hear the cat jumping from the closet and into the bedroom to escape.

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pointless

lurk tears.

it is like the feeling just before the yawn.

pain.

want to tell it.

indefinable.

my fingers are very cold.

feel alone. maybe I am, too.

helpless. I'm feeling

me in the world know about it anymore.