Picasso once told me what he does when he is sad or desperate. He paints It helps if you look at the shadow draws from the soul, he once said to me. Tonight, as I myself did not dare to sleep, I thought of him. I would love to talk with him, but Picasso has this week off. Middle of the night I got up and got the pins taken out of the closet, he has given me. I tried the terrible drawing pictures, so I get rid of them again. But they are increasingly clear to me as soon as my eyes do.
In Karl Horst times I had to change the bulb in the cellar. None of us wanted to get down there. We have had all fear. We have drawn matches and I was caught's. It was scary. From the ceiling a naked bulb hanging from a wire. She looked like a tennis ball. And she has made noises. Just as when Jonas cracks with his knuckles. Just this has heard. The light went on and off, and each time it has cracked. Of course I knew well: On one side of the bed linen hung out to dry with the towels. And on the other hand, the baskets are with our shorts and T-shirts. But the light had doller trembled as myself, and I'm afraid, behind the sheets would be a man and get me. If
is to make my eyes and think of my return it as on the day in the home. The dirty lamp flickers. Knack knack, . Whenever there is light, I see just the pictures. I see as I kneel down in a quiet place. Nearby is a street. And a high chimney. Then I go along a long tunnel. At the end of the tunnel, I meet a man The man has a suit and waiting for me in an old house. I go in and talk to him. Suddenly the man begins to laugh. Quite loudly. He listens to no more. I do not know about what the man laughs. As he turns to me, I come up behind him. I put a rope around his neck and push. Very slowly, until the man stopped breathing.
What are these pictures? Where are they? I'm a nightmare, caught, which has no end? I am not here in my room, but still in practice with Dr. Tiefensee, trapped in hypnosis? Are these images from my previous life? Or is it all merely of the thing in my head? I wish I could make my own way and find the place that I see when I close my eyes. Horatio Caine would do this eventually. If I really have killed a man, then he's probably still there, in the old house. But I'm too weak. Carina has real trouble getting to Professor Mueller for our trip on my birthday. He but has probably never even heard of it. If I tell you now from the images and shadows will definitely get even more trouble. Who can help me anyway?
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